Thursday, April 14, 2005
Another Milestone!
April 14, 2 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. I can't believe a year's gone by so fast. Friends, family, strangers: I have been a-bloggin' for a year. Yesterday, in fact, was my one year blogversary.
Time out: I'm really distracted because I'm sitting in Bear Rock (as is my custom), and I'm trying to write to you all about this big achievement, but John Denver is singing "Country Roads," and I can't think of anything else until he stops.
west virginia
mountain mama
take me home
country roads
take me home
country roads
take me home
country roads
Ok, moving on. Like I was saying, it was a year ago yesterday that I was inspired (I think by Bryan Bailey) to start a blog, and 27,717 words later, here we are. Blogger has stopped counting my posts, so I know there are at least 105, though I'm certain that there are quite a few more than that. I think it only appropriate to commemorate this occasion with a look back at some of my favorite posts and comments from my readers that have made this blog all it is...and more.
April 19, 2004
Lessons Learned From Moulin Rouge
April 25, 2004...This one's always going to be a classic.
Ode to a Weather Man (and an apology for breaking his heart)
Perfect suit, perfect hair,
You tell me of the weather
With such flair.
Cold fronts in, pressure high,
A storm system may be
Drawing nigh.
No matter what storms may come our way,
You're always on air
Day by day.
Oh Bobby, my love, forgive me for leaving
You weeping, sobbing, bereft,
Bereaving.
I promise one day to quench your heart's yearn.
I'll show up at your studio.
Channel 12 New Bern.
April 26, 2004
So to live in love means to live, loving unabashedly a God who is crazy in love with you, and to allow this love relationship to affect your relationships with others.
May 21, 2004
80's rocker. Think about the Wedding Singer when they're on the airplane and Billy Idol is there, and they've tried to make him up to look like he did back in '85, but the movie was obviously made 15 years later and Billy's not exactly a spring chicken any more. Take off the make-up so he looks like he does for real. Then add 10 more years. THEN add an 80's rocker stringy MULLET...blonde of course. Ok, there's the top part. Traveling on down, he's wearing a black leather vest (no shirt) that has a giant black widow spyder (for this guy, I feel it should be spelled with a "y") covering the whole back of it. On his left arm, he has 2 tattoos. One says "NO Fun" while the other wraps around his arm a few times and just says over and over "Let it go Let it go Let it go" in black and red cursive. Around his wrist, there are about 10 metal bracelets, many of which are quite spiky. On his right arm, he has a couple of tattoos as well. The only one I got a really good view of was a star, and inside the star, it said, "STAR." Classic. He also has about 10 metal (some spiky) bracelets on that wrist. Mind you, this guy isn't the beefiest of boys. He's pretty scrawny. I think I could've taken him.
Moving right along down...TIGHT black jeans. They were definitely customized, however, with pink stitching and various inserts and patches made of different kinds of fabrics/patterns (leopard being a prominent one). I apologize for not taking better notice of his shoes. I don't think there was anything very noteworthy about them. I'm pretty sure they were black. Oh- he also carries a bag that has a chain for a strap.
Now, bad-middle-aged-burnt-out-80's-rocker-man is purchasing but one thing this evening at our local drug store. Any guesses?
Trojans. A big ol' Sam's club/Costco-buy-it-in-bulk package of prophylactics. EWWW!!! Ew Ew EW! Man...if there's somebody out there who'll do it with him, ANYTHING is possible. I might even find myself a gentleman who can shag (no remarks, Texan, it's a dance) and will propose to me at the Cloisters.
May 26, 2004
What if instead of competing based on sales/profit, retail businesses competed based on a weekly sack race?! Just imagine! Every Saturday, all up and down Broadway, all the retail outfits competing for #1. Urban Outfitters would have an asymmetrical 80's looking sack. AE would have a "vintage" denim one that would look exactly like A&F, but would just be cheaper and would fall apart quicker, Express would have either a black or purple lycra sack that was way too tight, Aldo would have a giant shoe, Old Navy's racers would just be on the ground on top of each other (much like their clothing generally is in the store), and Prada would observe from the bowels of their bourgeois basement via live webcam. No blue ribbon for you Prada.
June 26, 2004
Tips for and Notes on Airport Living
1) Find a bench spot and claim it early. When you get on it, stay put until you're ready to get up.
2) Stretch all the way out. Don't curl up or your excess foot room WILL be taken.
3) Secure your belongings to each other and yourself.
4) Luggage cart: can be used doubly as a footstool to provide other sleeping position alternatives.
5) Go to sleep early so you can wake up early so when you want to "bathe" in the bathroom, there aren't many people in there with you.
6) Sleep with it or sleep on top of it.
7) A hand towel and a hefty classic tome will suffice for a pillow.
All of July's pretty good. Revisit it if you have the time.
August 8, 2004
I have been inspired to take themed vacations from now on. This one, I suppose we could call an overview of Europe. But from this point forward, smaller trips with fun themes such as:
-the traditional dancing tour (ceilidh, lindler, flamenco, etc.)
-the chocolate tour
-The Sound of Music tour
-the smooching tour (Julie's suggestion, which had been previously suggested to her from someone else)
-the eastern European spy tour.
September 12, 2004
"My Life is SO Normal"
September 22, 2004
"AEO 4-ever"
November 3, 2004
On the subway headed downtown, Lauren was blotting her face grease (yumm) and the guy sitting across from us noticed and started laughing. We thought he just had a good sense of humor so we laughed with him. Then we realized he was really high...and drunk...and Latino (not that there's ANYTHING wrong with being Latino, but it made all the y's come out like j's, dictation forthcoming). The conversation went something like this:
High Guy: (very slurred speech) Jou shouldn't do that.
Lauren: Why not?
HG: Becouze of the it looking like that.
Lauren and Beth: (Confused, tentative laughter)
1 minute later as Lauren is applying pressed powder
HG: Jou shouldn't do that.
Lauren: Why not?
HG: Becouze the sweat will make it all...
Lauren: (Wondering why High Guy is giving her make-up tips) Uh huh
HG: (To Beth) I like jour hair.
Beth: (Not understanding the slurred speech) What?
HG: Jour hair. I like it.
Beth: Oh, thanks.
HG: Tha's how I want mines.
Beth: I'll send you to my stylist.
HG: (Pulling at his hair as if trying to make it grow) Jus' give me another half a year.
Beth: Mmkay.
HG: Can I have jour phone number?
Beth: No.
HG: Can I have jour number so I can talk to jou?
Beth: No.
HG: Can I talk to jou again?
Beth: No.
HG: I want jour phone number.
Beth: No.
2 minutes later, High Guy decides he wants to stand REALLY inappropriately close to me, and the conversation coninues as he breathes his nasty alcohol breath on my head:
HG: I love jour eyes.
Beth: Yikes.
HG: I love jour eyes.
Beth: Um...thanks?
HG: I love jour eyes.
Beth: Please don't stand so close to me.
November 28, 2004
Bryan said...
Yikes... a hit woman??? (what are your rates??) hehe... stay off crack. don't drink and drive. (oh that's right... there are too many folks up there to drive, and there's not enough room to drive anything bigger than a corn dog through the streets)
5:29 PM
andrea said...
i'd love to see you drive a corn dog thru manhattan
4:42 PM
Anonymous said...
I like this post anonymously! That rocks! I can't believe you quote Bryan....though I love him! I want to see Bryan drive a corn dog through Manhattan. Sweet!
December 10, 2004
I heard Carly Simon on the radio the other day...doing the weather. So sad. So sad.
Katherine said...
Ooo, ooooo.....Was Carly talking about clouds in her coffee?
January 31, 2005
"Beast of Burden"
Bryan said...
Yet another reason as to why I don't live in NY or the Northeast for that matter. God made cars, and God made us to drive em. See, I have spent all day driving my snot green chevy wherever I wanted to go. Think about it. You want Wendy's... you go to wendy's. You want to move some stuff, well, just load it in the back of the trusty pickup. Wow! How do you yankess get along up there? No thanks... I'm staying here in Texas!!
7:35 PM
Anonymous said...
i'm confused....i thought bryan drove a corn dog.....(This is my most favorite comment of all the comments ever posted on my blog, by the way. Anonymous, you rock!)
March 12, 2005
"Update"
March 18, 2005
I just had a conversation with a Bear Rock employee that went like this:
me: Do you have hot tea?
her: Yeah, just the plain ol' black stuff (she retrieves it and shows it to me).
me: How much is it?
her: $1.18
me: OK, I'll take it.
her: Did you want some hot water for that?
me: No thanks, I'll just suck on the bag.
her: (Completely in earnest) Seriously?
me: (Completely in disbelief) No.
March 28, 2005
"Copycat Copycat!"
and the accompanying March 31, 2005
"My Tattoo"
April 6, 2005
"Burnin' all the shoes I've ever owned."
"Hold me closer, Tony Danza!"
And I believe that THIS is the longest blog I've ever posted...or the longest post I've ever blogged. I shall conclude with an entertaining sight I saw in Target the other day. You know how the sale stuff is all up at the front so you'll see it when you fist come in? Well, there were these little flower pot thingies, and on the description/price tag located on the shelf below them, the description said, "GROW POT." Target!! For shame!!
Thank you thank you, one and all, for reading so faithfully and making me feel worthwhile as a writer.
Time out: I'm really distracted because I'm sitting in Bear Rock (as is my custom), and I'm trying to write to you all about this big achievement, but John Denver is singing "Country Roads," and I can't think of anything else until he stops.
west virginia
mountain mama
take me home
country roads
take me home
country roads
take me home
country roads
Ok, moving on. Like I was saying, it was a year ago yesterday that I was inspired (I think by Bryan Bailey) to start a blog, and 27,717 words later, here we are. Blogger has stopped counting my posts, so I know there are at least 105, though I'm certain that there are quite a few more than that. I think it only appropriate to commemorate this occasion with a look back at some of my favorite posts and comments from my readers that have made this blog all it is...and more.
April 19, 2004
Lessons Learned From Moulin Rouge
April 25, 2004...This one's always going to be a classic.
Ode to a Weather Man (and an apology for breaking his heart)
Perfect suit, perfect hair,
You tell me of the weather
With such flair.
Cold fronts in, pressure high,
A storm system may be
Drawing nigh.
No matter what storms may come our way,
You're always on air
Day by day.
Oh Bobby, my love, forgive me for leaving
You weeping, sobbing, bereft,
Bereaving.
I promise one day to quench your heart's yearn.
I'll show up at your studio.
Channel 12 New Bern.
April 26, 2004
So to live in love means to live, loving unabashedly a God who is crazy in love with you, and to allow this love relationship to affect your relationships with others.
May 21, 2004
80's rocker. Think about the Wedding Singer when they're on the airplane and Billy Idol is there, and they've tried to make him up to look like he did back in '85, but the movie was obviously made 15 years later and Billy's not exactly a spring chicken any more. Take off the make-up so he looks like he does for real. Then add 10 more years. THEN add an 80's rocker stringy MULLET...blonde of course. Ok, there's the top part. Traveling on down, he's wearing a black leather vest (no shirt) that has a giant black widow spyder (for this guy, I feel it should be spelled with a "y") covering the whole back of it. On his left arm, he has 2 tattoos. One says "NO Fun" while the other wraps around his arm a few times and just says over and over "Let it go Let it go Let it go" in black and red cursive. Around his wrist, there are about 10 metal bracelets, many of which are quite spiky. On his right arm, he has a couple of tattoos as well. The only one I got a really good view of was a star, and inside the star, it said, "STAR." Classic. He also has about 10 metal (some spiky) bracelets on that wrist. Mind you, this guy isn't the beefiest of boys. He's pretty scrawny. I think I could've taken him.
Moving right along down...TIGHT black jeans. They were definitely customized, however, with pink stitching and various inserts and patches made of different kinds of fabrics/patterns (leopard being a prominent one). I apologize for not taking better notice of his shoes. I don't think there was anything very noteworthy about them. I'm pretty sure they were black. Oh- he also carries a bag that has a chain for a strap.
Now, bad-middle-aged-burnt-out-80's-rocker-man is purchasing but one thing this evening at our local drug store. Any guesses?
Trojans. A big ol' Sam's club/Costco-buy-it-in-bulk package of prophylactics. EWWW!!! Ew Ew EW! Man...if there's somebody out there who'll do it with him, ANYTHING is possible. I might even find myself a gentleman who can shag (no remarks, Texan, it's a dance) and will propose to me at the Cloisters.
May 26, 2004
What if instead of competing based on sales/profit, retail businesses competed based on a weekly sack race?! Just imagine! Every Saturday, all up and down Broadway, all the retail outfits competing for #1. Urban Outfitters would have an asymmetrical 80's looking sack. AE would have a "vintage" denim one that would look exactly like A&F, but would just be cheaper and would fall apart quicker, Express would have either a black or purple lycra sack that was way too tight, Aldo would have a giant shoe, Old Navy's racers would just be on the ground on top of each other (much like their clothing generally is in the store), and Prada would observe from the bowels of their bourgeois basement via live webcam. No blue ribbon for you Prada.
June 26, 2004
Tips for and Notes on Airport Living
1) Find a bench spot and claim it early. When you get on it, stay put until you're ready to get up.
2) Stretch all the way out. Don't curl up or your excess foot room WILL be taken.
3) Secure your belongings to each other and yourself.
4) Luggage cart: can be used doubly as a footstool to provide other sleeping position alternatives.
5) Go to sleep early so you can wake up early so when you want to "bathe" in the bathroom, there aren't many people in there with you.
6) Sleep with it or sleep on top of it.
7) A hand towel and a hefty classic tome will suffice for a pillow.
All of July's pretty good. Revisit it if you have the time.
August 8, 2004
I have been inspired to take themed vacations from now on. This one, I suppose we could call an overview of Europe. But from this point forward, smaller trips with fun themes such as:
-the traditional dancing tour (ceilidh, lindler, flamenco, etc.)
-the chocolate tour
-The Sound of Music tour
-the smooching tour (Julie's suggestion, which had been previously suggested to her from someone else)
-the eastern European spy tour.
September 12, 2004
"My Life is SO Normal"
September 22, 2004
"AEO 4-ever"
November 3, 2004
On the subway headed downtown, Lauren was blotting her face grease (yumm) and the guy sitting across from us noticed and started laughing. We thought he just had a good sense of humor so we laughed with him. Then we realized he was really high...and drunk...and Latino (not that there's ANYTHING wrong with being Latino, but it made all the y's come out like j's, dictation forthcoming). The conversation went something like this:
High Guy: (very slurred speech) Jou shouldn't do that.
Lauren: Why not?
HG: Becouze of the it looking like that.
Lauren and Beth: (Confused, tentative laughter)
1 minute later as Lauren is applying pressed powder
HG: Jou shouldn't do that.
Lauren: Why not?
HG: Becouze the sweat will make it all...
Lauren: (Wondering why High Guy is giving her make-up tips) Uh huh
HG: (To Beth) I like jour hair.
Beth: (Not understanding the slurred speech) What?
HG: Jour hair. I like it.
Beth: Oh, thanks.
HG: Tha's how I want mines.
Beth: I'll send you to my stylist.
HG: (Pulling at his hair as if trying to make it grow) Jus' give me another half a year.
Beth: Mmkay.
HG: Can I have jour phone number?
Beth: No.
HG: Can I have jour number so I can talk to jou?
Beth: No.
HG: Can I talk to jou again?
Beth: No.
HG: I want jour phone number.
Beth: No.
2 minutes later, High Guy decides he wants to stand REALLY inappropriately close to me, and the conversation coninues as he breathes his nasty alcohol breath on my head:
HG: I love jour eyes.
Beth: Yikes.
HG: I love jour eyes.
Beth: Um...thanks?
HG: I love jour eyes.
Beth: Please don't stand so close to me.
November 28, 2004
Bryan said...
Yikes... a hit woman??? (what are your rates??) hehe... stay off crack. don't drink and drive. (oh that's right... there are too many folks up there to drive, and there's not enough room to drive anything bigger than a corn dog through the streets)
5:29 PM
andrea said...
i'd love to see you drive a corn dog thru manhattan
4:42 PM
Anonymous said...
I like this post anonymously! That rocks! I can't believe you quote Bryan....though I love him! I want to see Bryan drive a corn dog through Manhattan. Sweet!
December 10, 2004
I heard Carly Simon on the radio the other day...doing the weather. So sad. So sad.
Katherine said...
Ooo, ooooo.....Was Carly talking about clouds in her coffee?
January 31, 2005
"Beast of Burden"
Bryan said...
Yet another reason as to why I don't live in NY or the Northeast for that matter. God made cars, and God made us to drive em. See, I have spent all day driving my snot green chevy wherever I wanted to go. Think about it. You want Wendy's... you go to wendy's. You want to move some stuff, well, just load it in the back of the trusty pickup. Wow! How do you yankess get along up there? No thanks... I'm staying here in Texas!!
7:35 PM
Anonymous said...
i'm confused....i thought bryan drove a corn dog.....(This is my most favorite comment of all the comments ever posted on my blog, by the way. Anonymous, you rock!)
March 12, 2005
"Update"
March 18, 2005
I just had a conversation with a Bear Rock employee that went like this:
me: Do you have hot tea?
her: Yeah, just the plain ol' black stuff (she retrieves it and shows it to me).
me: How much is it?
her: $1.18
me: OK, I'll take it.
her: Did you want some hot water for that?
me: No thanks, I'll just suck on the bag.
her: (Completely in earnest) Seriously?
me: (Completely in disbelief) No.
March 28, 2005
"Copycat Copycat!"
and the accompanying March 31, 2005
"My Tattoo"
April 6, 2005
"Burnin' all the shoes I've ever owned."
"Hold me closer, Tony Danza!"
And I believe that THIS is the longest blog I've ever posted...or the longest post I've ever blogged. I shall conclude with an entertaining sight I saw in Target the other day. You know how the sale stuff is all up at the front so you'll see it when you fist come in? Well, there were these little flower pot thingies, and on the description/price tag located on the shelf below them, the description said, "GROW POT." Target!! For shame!!
Thank you thank you, one and all, for reading so faithfully and making me feel worthwhile as a writer.
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