Thursday, September 15, 2005
The Downside of Anonymity
It went something like this:
1. I posted a comment about Clay Aiken's improper use of the word "was" in his terribly sketchy (yet catchy) stalker song, "Invisible."
2. I posted a blurb about sweating and Certain Dri which included a fair amount of what I call "southernspeak." One phrase included a use of the word "neither" that, while improper in Standard American English, is entirely correct in southernspeak.
3. The mysterious "Clay" ridiculed my use of "neither," asking in turn if "If I was invisible" would not also fall under the category of southernspeak.
I say no, "Clay." If this phrase were to fall into that category, it would at the very least be stated, "If I's invisible," contracting the subject and horrendous verb.
My big problem, "Clay," is that I don't know who you are, and you seem very upset about my comments regarding a certain famous personage of the same name. So either someone is messing with me, or when you move to your undisclosed location in Raleigh, you and I need to sit down and talk some things over. You can come to my apartment. We'll have dinner. I'll cook (I'm a culinary genius), and we'll figure it all out. Then we shall allow one thing to lead to another and see where the night takes us.
1. I posted a comment about Clay Aiken's improper use of the word "was" in his terribly sketchy (yet catchy) stalker song, "Invisible."
2. I posted a blurb about sweating and Certain Dri which included a fair amount of what I call "southernspeak." One phrase included a use of the word "neither" that, while improper in Standard American English, is entirely correct in southernspeak.
3. The mysterious "Clay" ridiculed my use of "neither," asking in turn if "If I was invisible" would not also fall under the category of southernspeak.
I say no, "Clay." If this phrase were to fall into that category, it would at the very least be stated, "If I's invisible," contracting the subject and horrendous verb.
My big problem, "Clay," is that I don't know who you are, and you seem very upset about my comments regarding a certain famous personage of the same name. So either someone is messing with me, or when you move to your undisclosed location in Raleigh, you and I need to sit down and talk some things over. You can come to my apartment. We'll have dinner. I'll cook (I'm a culinary genius), and we'll figure it all out. Then we shall allow one thing to lead to another and see where the night takes us.
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I think someone IS messing with you.
I think those are some fairly risky aspirations considering that you don't even know who you are dealing with. Do you normally invite serial killers to have dinner and see where the night takes you? The basis for my thoughts here rests with the choice of "Clay" for an anonymous disguise. To choose such a reference leaves you with only two outs...you're gay...or you're a serial killer.
In the case that someone is messing with you...and you're wondering who that is...you can take me off of the hit list because I'm "neither" gay nor prone to killing.
In the case that someone is messing with you...and you're wondering who that is...you can take me off of the hit list because I'm "neither" gay nor prone to killing.