Onward Hoe!

Have y'all seen the commercial for ProFlowers (or something like that) with the couple on the beach? They look all lovey-dovey, and then the man starts to speak, and you think he's going to talk about how great the girl is, but instead, choosing his words very carefully, he says, "Rebecca, you are so...average. So incredibly...adequate. Every time I look at you, my heart says, 'Hey look, it's Rebecca. She'll do.'"

This mess cracks me up, but if a dude I was into (who I thought was into me too) ever said that to me, I think I would punch him in the neck. Take note, gentlemen. If you're not absolutely crazy about me (or whatever woman you've got in your life), don't bother. I only want the real deal (and I suspect I'm not the only one).