Onward Hoe!

For the first year that I had gmail, I hardly got any spam at all. Now I'm getting just gads and gads of it. Gmail's filter is really pretty good though, so even though I get a lot more spam now, it almost always catches it in the spam folder, and I just delete it. There have only been about three that have gotten through to my inbox. Gmail's awesome that way.

Anyway, apparently the spamming community is under the impression that I am a man, and a not-very-well-endowed one at that. They think that I need help getting dates, and that when I have dates, I need an herbal supplement to satisfy my women.

Well, spammers, let me just say once and for all that I am a woman. And just because I don't date a lot, that doesn't mean that I need or want your help. And I certainly don't want your help satisfying my woman, because I don't have a woman, because gosh-darnit, I just can't help myself. I like men. (I have a bunch of hoes, but I think they're pretty well satisfied.) And I definitely don't want a bigger penis. So unless you're going to offer me advice about Cutie Von Hottenstein at the gym or a job for the summer (because I may or may not have mine) or a free Mediterranean vacation for two, just leave me alone, will ya?!