Onward Hoe!

I decided to invest in a hat for walking. I don't know what happened to all my Caswell hats, but I don't have any, and since I don't look good in sunglasses, and since I sometimes walk first thing in the morning when my hair's still all jacked up from sleeping on it, I decided to invest in a hat. So I coerced Whitney into going with me to Wal-Mart after Blades of Glory tonight (which you should go see if you are a Will Ferrell fan...I'm hoarse from laughing). I don't know why she agreed to go. Poor thing had been up for like 18 hours already. But anyway...

Wal-Mart has pretty much an entire wall covered in hats. At first, my eye was drawn to the camouflage Chevy hat, but it was so tiny. A lot of the hats were like that. They felt like they only came down about an eighth of your head...like they were just kind of perched on top. Very strange. Anyway, I settled on a Dubble Bubble hat that looks to be already "worn in." It looks comfy to me, and kind of vintage. And I needed a hat. So it went with me to the register, where we met Anne, the third shift checkout girl (I am using the word "girl" here very loosely as Anne looked to be about 65.).

Now I don't know if Anne was drunk or what. I mean, I know I'd have to be drunk in order to work the third shift on the Wal-Mart register, so I wouldn't blame her, but she sure did slur and mumble a lot of her words, which went something like this:

"You gonna buy this ratty ol' thang? Man, the stuff people'll buy these days...look like ol' rags."

Ok, number one, she was like the Boomhauer of the store. Number 2, isn't that just the most stellar sales tactic you've ever heard? And #3, who is Anne that she gets to pass judgment on my purchase like that? Whitney and I were just floored.

So now if you see me walking in my Dubble Bubble hat, you'll know not only the story of its purchase, but also Anne's opinion of it.